Bellkipeg - The Final Chapter

84)

Alex walked towards the circle, treading carefully with each step measured; his knees slightly bent with each footfall connecting with the heart of Bellkipeg. He knew who the small boy was even though the boy had his back to Alex. The boy turned at this acknowledgement and smiled. It was Alex aged nine.

“Well met, my brother.” The boy said.

“We’ve no need for the façade any longer.” Alex replied, smiling back.

“Awww…” The boy wined. “You take the fun out of everything… but then you always did.” Alex remained calm and simply stood just out of arm’s length. The boy smiled again, more excitedly and stood up, dusting himself down. “Did you see the Fun House exterior? I thought that was pretty cool, and funny. Did you think it was funny?”

“It was lost on me, I’m afraid. I didn’t really understand the relevance of it.” Alex replied, shaking his head.

“You mean you don’t remember?” The boy hung his head and seemed to sulk before looking up again. “Ah, of course, more time would have elapsed for you than it has for me. For me it still seems like yesterday it happened.” The boy laughed, but the laughter seemed hollow. “Believe it or not, it’s where I was born. Do you seriously not remember?” Alex shook his head. “We were nine.. well, I still am.” He sniggered. “There was this fun fair in Stapleford, or somewhere like that.. and nothing really interested us except for this fun house. It looked like the house out of the Munsters.”

“And we wanted to go in alone.” Alex interrupted. “Mum wouldn’t let me, but I persuaded her; wore her down by pleading that we were big enough to do it by ourselves. Eventually she relented.”

“And we walked in, didn’t like what we saw; got lost in the dark and screamed for her to come and get us.” The boy laughed.

“Yes, I do remember now,” Alex admitted. “but I don’t understand how that could have given birth to all this.”

“Do you remember what was in the dark that made you so scared?” The boy asked, wryly.

“No… “

“That hardly surprises me. That memory block is partly the reason why I’m still here. It’s the part of yourself that still can’t acknowledge the whole story despite your 

vaunted awareness!”  The boy shook his head and tutted loudly. He began to walk a tight circle around Alex, gesturing. Every time he gestured a mirror suddenly rose up from the blackness. 

“Inside the dark was a hall of cracked and warped mirrors. There was enough residual light to form glimmering reflections that fractured and splintered each time we moved. It was the first time that you saw yourself as such a fractured and splintered soul, and it was too much for your nine year old brain to handle. That was why you were in a near-catatonic state when mum found you, and she had to walk us out of the fun house. You repressed those sights but in doing so you created me.” Both Alex and the boy were now surrounded by a circle of mirrors and it was then that Alex realised that the light was becoming dimmer.

85)

“I grew in time, fed by your increasing inadequacies. The teenage years were such fertile ground and we grew with each passing year. Don’t get me wrong, we never meant any harm. With each moment of despair or when you felt at your lowest ebb we hoped and prayed that you’d realise the root cause of your unhappiness and rescue us from the darkness… But no!” The boy stopped walking round and faced Alex, his eyes now deep in shadow. 

“You retreated into a world of fantasy, anything you could do to escape your unhappiness. Rather than rescue us you tried to run further away. The fantasy stirred something deep inside of you and part of you responded deeply by writing your own.” The boy shook his head in disdain. 

“But you even screwed that up. It became too real for you and you just backed away from it… but the damage had been done. Bellkipeg was born as a way for you to exorcise your demons and actually find me, but you couldn’t even do that! But I could…” 

The boy smiled as the lights dimmed even more, the reflections in the mirror becoming nothing more than shadows and each of the shadows swallowed up more of the mirrors surface. “I found that I could actually exist in Bellkipeg and grow strong, feeding on all that negativity that was still flowing freely. I could grow stronger and in 

time I knew that I would be able to control the land and then control you. It was me that caused your black-outs and panic attacks, and with each attack I took another piece of you, another sliver of your life essence leaving you weaker. However, there was part of you that would not be denied, that spark in you that refused to be extinguished, damn you!” He pointed at Alex in a stabbing motion. “Bellkipeg flooded your dreams, became waking visions –desperately trying to jolt you into ‘awakening’”

“But I couldn’t see it.” Alex interrupted.

“Didn’t want to see it, more like.” The boy shouted.

“No – I couldn’t bare it…”

“Yeah, you took the easy way out. But you couldn’t even commit suicide properly could you? You didn’t end up where you expected, eh? Bellkipeg’s final, desperate gamble.”

“I woke up in Bellkipeg before dying?” Alex asked. His wrists throbbed again, he put his hand to one and recoiled in pain. His hand was wet and sticky with blood.

“And you’re dying still, you just haven’t realised it.” The boy smiled triumphantly. “And when you die here your life essence will flow to me.” With that the lights were suddenly extinguished and the last thing that Alex saw was the boys smile; one of a great and terrible innocence.

86)

“You forget one thing, young one.” Alex whispered. “We are one another, and if I die, so do you..” He could hear the boy snort in derision. “But I am not dying today, and neither are you.” The light was barely a glimmer to start with. "Everything has led up to this moment, don't you see?" 

The glow intensified and the boy could see it now and took a step back. I had to be brought to this point; reduced to my lowest ebb in order to actually feel it." The most beautiful light was now emanating from Alex."I'm not the only one who was escaping. You were too, retreating into fear and anger... Look at your wrists now.” Alex told the boy. The boy looked at his wrists and recoiled in terror. There was blood dripping from them as there was from Alex’s.

“It doesn’t have to be this way.” Alex spoke and placed his right hand on the boys left wrist and then his left and on the boys right. When he took them away again there was no more blood; the cuts had simply disappeared.

“How?” The boy asked in tears. “I don’t understand…”

“You were right about Bellkipeg.” Alex explained. “It was the only way for us to be re-united. We had become irrevocably split for I no longer wanted to associate myself with the lost and lonely little boy that I saw cowering in the mirror, and did everything I could to deny him. You found solace in the darkness of the other, gathering strength from that darkness, but all the time being limited by our journey. And that journey has finally reached its conclusion.” Alex gestured, sending the mirrors scattering off into the distance. “We have no more need of warped reflections. We are the mirror image of each other.”

The boy nodded as tears flowed down his cheeks. “And we must become one.” He said. Alex started to cry too. “Yes, we must become one.” He took a step forward, the boy hesitated before following suit. “I am so sorry for denying you for so long, but no longer.” He said. “I am… We are the Creator, the nurturer and we will nurture each other. We will stronger together.”

Alex held out his hands, as he had with Onyx. The boy reciprocated and as their hands touched Alex could see all his adventures in Bellkipeg flash before him as he closed their eyes and became one. When he woke up again he was surprised to find himself in another wood, but this was the wood he had encountered when he first woke up in Bellkipeg at the start of his journey.

87)

He stood and looked around him. It was exactly the same wood, of that there was no doubt. Behind him was the tunnel of holly, the ground around him still smelt of loam and fresh rain. In front of him the stream still babbled, and as he walked down the

slope he saw the Stag standing magnificently in front of him he understood why he had been brought back.

The Stag was at peace, glowing with the energy of the collective souls of Bellkipeg. He knew what the Stag represented and why the boar had attacked him so mercilessly. He also knew that there would be no further attacks; the essence of the boar had been acknowledged, assimilated and integrated. He could reach his higher purpose and become one with the Stag.

He didn’t know what would await him upon crossing over, it must surely mean a hard road in order to successfully implement what he had learnt, but he knew that it would be worth it. The Stag looked deep within him and nodded its head. It was time.

Walking up to the Stag he placed one hand upon its flank and the other one on its head. As the Stags energy flowed into his own he saw the world of Bellkipeg slowly fade away and blur until he found himself staring into the mirror of his own bathroom… in his own flat.

And then he woke up.

Epilogue.

Morning. A warm, comfortable feeling of contentment soothed me as I stirred in the first dawnings of wakefulness; wrapped snugly in my duvet; in my own sofa bed. I was so reticent to shatter the hopes of this being real that I took a deep breath before slowly opening my eyes. 

I reached for my glasses –they were exactly where I expected them to be; perched precariously on the arm rest. I was calmed by the sense of familiarity as I looked around. The canvas print of Hopper’s “Nighthawks” glowed reassuringly back at me, and the tv reflected the world back. 

The shelves were still crammed with books; cd’s and dvd’s, but there were no 4 inch poseable action figures and a laptop stood where once before a word processor might have held pride of dust. I carefully got out of bed, tried to put my slippers on without teetering over and shuffled to the bathroom in a daze. What the hell had happened to me? How much of it was dream and how much of it had been real?

The knife was still in the sink where I had left it, in a small but congealed pool of blood. I looked at my wrists and there were two parallel lines running from left to right on, just scars. I ran my finger along each of the lines and there was no pain, just a numb sensation. I felt coldly detached from it all, as if any minute now a giant boar would shatter my reverie, or a cloud of ravens would envelope me suddenly but nothing happened. I ran a bath and looked at the stranger in the mirror. I stared at the face reflected back; no haggard, grimy faced boy returned my gaze; just me, myself; slightly bloodshot and hung-over.

Watching the steam dancing around me I saw flashbacks of my time in Bellkipeg and thought of all the people, Unicorns and Skincrawlers I’d met; all the experiences and trials I’d undertaken. But did it really happen? What was the purpose of it all and just why was I left with these scars?

I watched the mirror mist up and ghostly writing appeared upon the surface. “A little something to remember the experience by, Creator; don’t let it go to waste. Do something about it!”

I opened the bathroom door and ran to the easy chair next to my sofa-bed. My mud dried jeans were still haphazardly on the back where they’d been thrown. Rifling through the pockets I found that they were stuffed with crumpled sheets of paper, smeared and worn but still legible; I remembered finding them in a cave and by a stream. In another pocket a black arrowhead and a heart made of turquoise greeted me; gifts from the Faire-folk for the trials that I undertook and I smiled with all my heart; it had not been a dream after all.

And it was then that I remembered a promise that I had made to a Grugrk under a run-down old bridge, and I knew what I had to do next…

Bellkipeg - Part The Twenty-Seventh

81)

As Narhuat’s chrysalis convulsed and shuddered, so too did the cave in which they were hiding. The very rock was collapsing around them. Alex knew that his energy would prevent them from being hurt, but it would also mean that they would be completely engulfed by the Deluge.

Suddenly an intense ray of light, far brighter than that which Alex was emitting, burst forth from the cocoon. Alex watched as the chrysalis split in two and the Butterfly slowly and triumphantly emerged from its leathery carapace.

Inch by torturous inch it pushed itself out of its dead skin until finally it emerged; its wings still folded as it hung precariously upside down from its spindly legs. It flexed them a few times before it unfolded its wings, which had been so long cramped inside the cocoon. It unfurled its proboscis, tasting the air many times. Alex felt the same sensations in perfect harmony with the butterfly; his own revelations and subsequent rebirth were now a reality and he felt anew.

“I am nearly ready to fly, Creator.” Alex felt the Butterfly’s words in his head. “You have played your part admirably! Onyx would be proud, as we all are. Your rebirth is magnificent!”

“As am I… I am re-made… whole!” Alex replied. “But what should I call you now? You are no longer Narhuat because that is the name of your other self.”

“You know who I am, and what I have become –and what you have become.” Alex nodded and smiled, it was obvious really. “Say my name and reclaim your birth-right.” The butterfly said.

“Bellkipeg.” Alex replied triumphantly.

“Bellkipeg.” The butterfly responded, nodding. “Now I must spread the hope and the 

light across the world. I am the messenger of the triumph and the reclamation. You must fulfil your destiny as the Creator and make whole that has been torn asunder.”

“I bid you farewell. Thanks seems somewhat small for all that you have given and taught me.” Alex bowed.

“I thank you.” And with that Bellkipeg flexed its wings, extending them fully. “Now I must away.” Bellkipeg looked to the Deluge which was still kept at bay by Alex’s energy. “You will not keep me, Dark, for all your vaunted size and power. You have no dominion over me!”

With strength that belied his size, Bellkipeg beat its wings and flew up into the air. The Deluge howled in triumph, anticipating the claiming of such a prize, but the howls soon became cries of anguish and pain as the butterfly cut a swathe of light effortlessly through its gelatinous mass. Alex waved as it passed back in all its glory. He knew that he was now alone against the Deluge, and could feel its fury at allowing the escape. It was now exerting incredible pressure upon all sides of Alex’s light, squeezing with an almighty force and he could feel it the bubble start to buckle under the strain.

“No.” He calmly spoke, and waved his hand across his body. The Deluge responded in kind, and cleaved in two falling either side of Alex; the connection to its dark master severed. It could no longer threaten anyone else every again. Alex sent a burst of pure energy to the Deluge and it welled up beneath him like an almighty tsunami. Alex was truly the Creator, and he was now ready to confront The Presence and reclaim the land, as it had been written.

The Deluge swelled beneath him, rising him up on the crest of its shining viscous-black wave. There it carried him all the way back to the shore of the very land he had tried to escape from. Alex stepped off it and looked behind him, the Deluge now meekly waited for his next order – it was his to command, but in truth it always had been. He was of a purpose now.

In the distance he saw one lone horse and rider cleaving through the surf towards him. This was one of The Presence's guards. It had but one purpose now, to slay him before it was too late. The horse whinnied and snorted before stopping, hoofing at the pebbles and it was now that Alex could see clearly the rider. 

It wore black chain-mail armour, a cloak and hood hiding most of its face in shadow. It dismounted in a smooth, almost liquid fashion barely making a sound when it landed on the pebbles.

At eye level now, Alex could see the creatures face. It was almost featureless, smooth and mottled like a fish, and a large ovoid mouth with needle sharp teeth lining its jaws like a huge lamprey. To his horror, deep inside its mouth was a single glowing eye, a deep bloodshot red.

The creature unsheathed a sword from nowhere and took a step towards him. Alex shook his head slowly and took a step backwards. He gestured to the Deluge which suddenly uncoiled, shooting out towards the creature in a stabbing motion before enveloping it. Only the sound of the wind on the waves could be heard.

The Deluge withdrew again. Of the creature nothing remained except for the chain-mail armour and sword. The horse stood still, transfixed under the Deluges influence. Alex calmly put the creatures armour on for it was now his time to do battle. He mounted the horse in a fluid motion as if it was the most natural thing in the world for him to do, yet it was the first time he had ever done so. The horse accepted him as a rider and together they set forth towards the centre of Bellkipeg; to The Presence himself.

82)

The journey was swift for there were no more obstacles for Alex to overcome. The Deluge remained on the beach; it was no longer needed for Alex knew that there would be no further resistance.

He travelled across the landscape of Bellkipeg watching it change like a flicker book  until he finally arrived at the very heart. He smiled for he was in another wood, but this one was unlike the others he had previously traveled through.

Paradoxically it seemed very young; all the Birch and Beech trees were aligned in mis-matched rows closely packed together like a plantation. Their thin canopy still managed to strangle the light from the day, and the wind held its breath in dread and anticipation.

Soon even the horse would go no further and Alex was forced to walk the rest of the way. The closer he got to the source of the dis-ease the staler the air became and the darker it got. Alex had no idea what The Presence's abode would be like for up until now he had only thought of The Presence as an intangible boogie-man.

The wood thinned out again and as it did so Alex could see a distinct glow in the distance. As he walked ever closer to the inevitable he realised that the source of the glow was gaudy electric lights, flashing and strobing neon’s. He was both alarmed and confused by what he was witnessing. Alex had preconceptions of a castle, a cottage or even the re-appearance of his own home, which was where he believed The Presence had been conceived, but the sight that now met his eyes was incomprehensible.

It was a Fun House; a prefabricated, gaudy monstrosity; something more at home in a fairground rather than in the middle of the woods. It was built like a haunted mansion with mock Gothic columns either side of a huge door with cobwebs festooning the arches.

The mansion towered above him, the many windows all shining with sickening yellow and green lights. But it looked as scary and realistic as a papier mache building and Alex wondered just what he was walking into.

There were loud speakers either side of the entrance and Alex could hear faux-scary voices, high pitched screams and sobbing. A deep voice boomed out “Welcome to the Fun House… You’ll never leave.” Alex found it hard to suppress his smile.

In amongst all the b-movie wails, moans and screams Alex could hear the sound of a child sobbing, alternating with cries for his mummy and daddy. Alex felt a shiver traverse the length of his spine and he knew that all his answers lay beyond the doorway. He walked through the door brushing the cobwebs away and as he looked behind him he saw the world slowly fade away to a misty nothingness before the darkness enveloped him.

83)

The sight that met his eyes was even more bizarre, confounding his expectations once again. It was like standing in an abandoned movie set of a dungeon, complete with stone walls, wooden doors and a spiral staircase leading up at the far end of the corridor. Behind him was another wall with no sign of where he had entered. There was no ceiling overhead, simply blackness. The corridor smelt musty, unused and old with faint aromas of plywood and paint-thinner. Alex knew that he would find Onyx in one of the cells. He could feel the story of Bellkipeg draw around him with every echoing footstep, drawing to its inevitable conclusion. 

Onyx was actually in the ninth cell on the left, exactly where Alex knew he would be. However as he approached the cell he saw that there was no way for him to actually enter it, there was no door handle or even a key hole. Unperturbed Alex simply punched through the balsa door and pulled. The door was as sturdy as it looked and came apart easily, and as Alex walked into the cell and looked around he could see that it was only a movie set complete with support braces keeping the very walls up. It was getting more surreal by the minute!

Onyx sat in a corner, unharmed but aged and in chains. He was grey of beard and pockmarked with liver spots, his skin worn and dry but his eyes still had a spark and lit up upon seeing Alex.

“It’s ok, old friend.” Alex said as he knelt down to him. “I’m here. I’m so sorry I took so long to come to my senses.” Onyx smiled and tried to chuckle, but the sound

strangled into a coughing fit. When it subsided he said.

“I am glad that you made the choice to come here at all. I know it was hard for you, Creator.” He coughed again with the exertion of talking. “For Creator you truly are now.”

“Yes. I am.”

“And you know now what must be done?”

“Yes I do, old friend. We’ve been apart for far too long. It’s time I realised myself and stopped trying to externalise it.” He held his hand out to Onyx. “Thank you, you have always been so patient with me.” Onyx took his hand and as he did so his whole being shone with the most transparent of lights, his very outline shimmered and then disappeared as his energy flowed into Alex.

Standing up, Alex had never felt so sure of himself, so powerful and yet completely at peace. The energy he had witnessed upon Narhuat’s transformation was nothing compared to what he was feeling now. He felt completely aware and with that awareness he felt emptiness, some kind of imbalance and he knew what it was and what needed to be done.

He looked around him at the flimsy sets and props which had outlived their usefulness and in a quiet but powerful voice he said “I no longer need this..” He gestured around him. “this… ego scaffold. I can see now… Show yourself to me and we will finish this.” Suddenly the dungeon was plunged into darkness and in the distance was a circle of light, and standing in that circle of light was a small boy.

Bellkipeg - Part The Twenty-Sixth

78)

It was the Deluge that covered the sea in front of him and Alex knew that it had been hypnotising him through the suns reflection on the sea. Alex had to fight every instinct in him to run away, for with this revelation he suddenly remembered how he had become a prisoner on the island.  Now he knew the truth Alex had to be more careful than ever. He could not act any differently than normal; he could not let the Deluge know that he had changed at all otherwise it would surely spell disaster for both himself and Narhuat.

Alex had to keep his awareness levels up at all times and not fall under the spell. This meant finding Narhuat and discovering a way to lose themselves in the forest. Alex knew now that there were caves which would provide shelter for them both, and it was there where he would find Narhuat. But now was not the time for the sun was starting to set and for Alex to wander into the forest now would be to raise suspicion.

Alex closed his eyes. He knew that as long as he could keep up the pretense of normality he would be safe and the Deluge would remain dormant. He also knew that there was nothing else he could do and, therefore, nothing to worry about. The past didn’t hold him, and neither did his future... and with that in his mind Alex laid onto his back, closed his eyes and went to sleep. 

He woke slowly and in stages, aware that upon waking he would start to fall into the Deluge’s trance state again. He knew that the frequency of the pulses on the water were always at their strongest when he woke up. They were violent in intensity but almost subliminal.

Alex was able to counter the effects of the pulses by blinking his eyes in rapid succession, in order to match the frequency of the waves. It was initially hard work to control, but with practice he could do it automatically. Once he had reached that stage he knew he would be safe to find Narhuat.

Upon standing, Alex tried to keep as close to his natural routine as possible. Great efforts were made to observe the minutiae of his routines lest the Deluge become aware that something was amiss. He then walked into the forest to find him; knowing exactly where he would be: in the cave system, hiding in a small alcove deep within.

Alex carefully walked in to the cavern and sat with his back resting on the wall, his shoulders just below the alcove. He felt Narhuat inch his way onto his shoulder.

“I must say that I’m glad that you have finally come to your senses, Creator.” He said. “You did have me a little worried.”

“Yes.” Alex replied. “And I’m sorry.”

“Truth be told, it wasn’t your fault entirely. No one knew how you would react when you were faced with the news of your doppelganger. That was one of the reasons the Unicorns were chosen to deliver the message to you.” Narhuat explained. “They are beyond reproach and you knew that. There could never have been any doubt in your mind that they were telling the truth.”

“And that was what made it so hard for me to take.”

“The time for recriminations is over.” Narhuat consoled. “Now is a time for transformation.” He smiled wryly.

“What do you mean?”

“Surely you know enough about my physiology to ask such a question. You must know what caterpillars change into!”

“Of course!”

“Surely you know then that any form of transformation is forbidden by The Presence. Once sensed, the Deluge will do everything it can to destroy me and prevent this from happening. In my chrysalis form I will be far more vulnerable to attack which is why I have hidden in the caves. This will offer me more time and a little more protection, I hope.”

“But I will protect you.” Alex interrupted.

“Yes, you will.” Narhuat replied, pleased with his response. “You have remembered your power, Creator, but it is still under your conscious control and you still take great effort to effect these changes. Your final battle with the Deluge will take its toll on you for it will be both an external and an internal, psychic battle; but you must not falter. Use your strength and fight with understanding, love and courage; but most important of all, you must fight with your light! 

"Remember, you will not be alone. You are never alone, even in The Darkest moment.” Alex nodded, feeling the energy course through his very fibers as Narhuat spoke. “I, myself… I am feeling some fear, to be sure… With such a radical transformation it is only natural… Whilst in my chrysalis form I will cease to be a caterpillar and will actually be reduced to something without form, a fluctuating fluidic entity, much like the Deluge, but with the ultimate potential for good. I will then slowly reform into a butterfly, my transformation complete.”

“Will that be painful?” Alex asked.

“What transformation isn’t?”

79)

“What do you know about my metamorphosis, Creator?” Narhuat asked.

“If I’m honest, not much; all I really know is that you build yourself a chrysalis and become a butterfly, but I always assumed that the caterpillar simply grew wings.”

“Were it that simple.” Narhuat shook his tiny body slowly. “It’s much more complex and mirrors all forms of transformation. First, as you rightly said, comes the chrysalis stage which could be seen as a shedding of skin, as I have done on many occasions. Each occasion is a casting off of the old and unwanted, and it takes time for the new skin to dry and harden. This time the last vestments of my former self will disappear and I will be totally encased in my chrysalis. There I will be slowly transformed by a contradictory and wonderful magic.

“Whilst entombed I will be broken down on a cellular level, literally eaten from the inside by my digestive juices… can you imagine such a process?” Narhuat asked. Alex shook his head, trying to understand. It seemed fantastic. “I can see this surprises you, Creator. However as this is happening I am also growing anew, for those same juices are converting those parts of my physical body that are no longer needed into food for the new growth, which will happen at a rapid rate. Many of the cells will have been dormant through all of my evolutionary stages but will have existed in me as potential. Now, through this process they will grow and these cells will divide and sub-divide at an alarming rate as I will be made anew.

“What was once a lowly caterpillar will become a new entity entirely, in which all vestiges of the old me will cease to be. When it is finally time for me to be born again 

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Bellkipeg

it will take a huge amount of will to free myself from my cocoon, and in any normal situation it would take hours for me to be free and even then I will have to wait for my wings to harden.

“I will be vulnerable to the world then, at my weakest when I have so much to gain; but isn’t that always the way?” Alex was amazed by the sheer complexity of the transformation, he had never realised that it would be so magical, or painful. “But this is the process for all transformation, Creator. You must see that now.”

“How so?”

“As far as individualistic growth is concerned, you go through changes where you have to shed the beliefs and practices that once held true to you. The process is slow and inhibits you until the realisation dawns on you that these beliefs are no longer part of you, they are no longer true and therefore you can shuck them off and shed them like a skin. This is often a painful experience and afterwards you will feel vulnerable.

“This happens a number of times until you understand that in order for you to truly move on you will need to  transform as well. You will then move into your chrysalis stage and there you will be able to look at your life, take it apart and digest on those decisions you made and life paths chosen.

“You will think about the wrong paths that you have taken and feel your ego, your sense of who you were, disintegrate until you find those parts of you that hold the unlimited potential, and only then will you be able to build on them. Only then will you be able to become… But even then that will not be the end for you, you will still have to break out of your cocoon, your chrysalis. You must want to be free, and then once you have broken free you will have to harden yourself to the elements, become strong so you can soar on the winds of your destiny.”

Alex was in awe of Narhuat’s knowledge and understanding; he felt it with every pore of his body and he knew that it was time for his transformation to happen as well. His whole existence had been leading to this very moment.

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Bellkipeg

“I know you are ready, Creator, I feel it so strongly. But we must be careful.” Narhuat cautioned. “Ordinarily the process of metamorphosis would take days, but we do not have that luxury. The moment the Deluge senses this happening it will seek out and destroy us. I will need you to protect and empower me, as well as yourself.”

“How can I do this?” Alex asked.

“You must send me your light, your strength and your healing energies. Focus on me. Bathe me entirely in your light and love, and this will speed up my transformation. However, at the same time you must use what you learnt with Onyx and put a barrier up around us that the Deluge will not be able to penetrate. Use your light to envelop us in a sphere. In order to do this you must tap into the very roots of Bellkipeg, as you have been previously been shown.

“This will be very dangerous as you will be projecting your energy on three fronts: sending me healing and transformative energies, protecting us from the Deluge and also furthering your own personal transformation.”

Alex looked perplexed by this last statement.

“Do you not realise that my metamorphosis is mirroring your own? Where mine is manifesting on a physical level, yours is spiritual. You have been moving towards this for a long time; your whole life in fact, Creator. As above, so below. Sometimes you can grasp this easily, but there are times, like now, that you falter.”

“I don’t think I’m ready for this, Narhuat.” Alex admitted.

“In your heart you know you are.” Narhuat replied. “When I next see you, Creator, it will not be through my eyes, but those of a stranger. I, Narhuat, will cease to be. I fear this change, of course I do. Only a fool would undergo this without feeling fear, but I will not be held prisoner by it and it does not control me. Will you let your fear best you, hold you in its thrall or will you break free from the shackles that keep you in bondage and a slave to your fears? You have come so far to turn back now. When you finally realise yourself you will truly become the Creator!"

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Bellkipeg

80)

Alex knew that Narhuat spoke the truth; this was the time for transformation. This was what Onyx and Allura, had been leading Alex towards. Alex now had the task of protecting Narhuat through his dark night of the soul. He had never realised that the caterpillar underwent actual cellular transformation, but on the deepest level it made perfect sense. It was impossible to build on outmoded concepts, far better to deconstruct and break down in order to build anew.

“I’m ready.” He said to Narhuat. “Thank you for allowing me this honour.”

“It is I who should be thanking you, Creator. It is an honour to be instrumental in your final change.” Narhuat bowed before saying. “And you have been ready for some time.” Alex smiled and bowed back to the strangely wise caterpillar and visualised a bubble of golden light surrounding him. He placed his hands so they gently laid on the surface of the bubble, projecting his energy through.

“I bid you goodbye, Creator; until we meet again for the first time.” 

Like a stop-motion animation Alex watched as Narhuat convulsed, his whole body contorting once; twice; three times, pulsating; each muscle expanding and then contracting like a wave travelling the length of his tiny body. With the convulsions Alex could see a gossamer layer of skin detach itself slowly from Narhuat’s body and slowly shuck off with the final convulsion.

When the skin had finally been shed all that was left was a leathery looking pod, the cocoon that Alex could see pulsate slowly with a green luminescent light, a sign of Narhuat’s life force. The colour of the cocoon changed from a lime green to a mottled brown as it dried and hardened.

He heard a deafening roar, a sound that cut through the air like a banshees howl from the depths of hell itself: A howl of tormented anger, hate and spite. The Deluge had awoken to Narhuat’s transformation and would soon find them both. Alex had to be ready and protect Narhuat else they both fall prey to its evil, and with them would die 

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the final chance of Bellkipeg.

With each stage of the transformation Alex felt himself linked with Narhuat’s consciousness; his own awareness was expanding. He felt the fear of discorporatation; felt his own soul dissolve and then devolve, his memories scattering out in front of him and the ultimate irony as he finally understood who he was.

The Deluge swarthed out of the water, absorbing the mass of the sea around it to become more powerful than it had ever been. As it rolled and oozed onto the land it devoured everything in its path, leaving behind it a dead landscape. It was the only way that it could be sure that it was powerful enough to stop the transformation. This time there would be no error for even if the caterpillar escaped there would be nowhere else for it to hide, there would be no hope for Bellkipeg this time.

With each of Narhuat’s convulsions Alex felt it in his very soul: repressed memories surfaced in his mind; instrumental in shaping his personality from years ago. Disappointments, betrayals, helplessness, and rejections; each causing gradual isolation and despondent depression. Each memory was stripped away from him like flash-cuts; pizzicato images strobing into the distance until he could finally shuck away the skin of dead memories that no longer held him. That which he had striven so hard to find no longer meant anything to him. They held him back and could now be discarded leaving the raw self to harden.

The Deluge knew where Alex had hidden, there was only one way out and once surrounded they were trapped.

Alex sensed the Deluge outside and extended another sphere of golden light covering himself and the entrance of the cave. No longer limited by the disappointments of the past and the failures of the present he knew that the Deluge could not force its way through. So he concentrated on the chrysalis, aware now that Narhuat was no more. He had been broken apart on that cellular level, now just protoplasmic ooze. The 

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cocoon pulsated again and Alex shivered in harmony. Just then the Deluge smashed into his barrier of light with an almighty roar that Alex felt through his very pores. The roar was one of thwarted frustration. Now Alex would face the real test; like Narhuat he had to affect his own transformation to his most primal self with the very predatory darkness ready to devour him should he fail.

The whole cavern was now in total darkness save for the light that Alex projected. It was impossible for him to know what time of day it was, or how long he had been guarding Narhuat. He still felt the energy flowing from himself into Narhuat, affecting his transformation and he wondered how long he could carry on protecting them both.

He had seen the energy that Onyx had projected when they first encountered the Deluge and remembered his own barrier against the fog but neither Alex nor Onyx had been able to sustain it for long periods of time.

Alex also knew that the Deluge’s energy lay not only in its size and power but in its own ability to project and smother the environment, laying waste not only on a physical basis but also psychically as well. He could feel it now crawling into the darkest recesses of his mind. 

He shifted his position, being careful not to take his hands away from the sphere encircling Narhuat. Sitting cross-legged he made sure that his back was to the mouth of the cave. As long as Alex kept the circle of light strong he was sure that they were in no danger.

Silence fell over the cave. Suddenly it was shattered by the sound of first one stone rebounding across the wall in front of him and then another. He ignored them, it was impossible to tell if this was really happening or simply a hallucination caused by the Deluge. Then Alex heard a voice that was unmistakable.

“Creator, listen to me.” It was Allura. Alex wanted so much to turn around and embrace her, but he knew that he couldn’t and daren’t. “It’s all your fault, you hear me? I blame you! I should’ve killed you when I had the chance…” Alex could 

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scarcely believe what he was hearing; it was unthinkable that Allura could be saying such things. “The Mirror of Sfel? It was a trap! It held a sliver of the Deluge within its matrix. When we opened ourselves to it my whole village was consumed by their own fear and anger. I’m the only survivor, and it’s all your fault!” Alex shivered at such accusations. He was about to turn round and remonstrate with her but then realised that such a thing could not be true. There was no way for the mirror to be possessed by the Deluge.

Hearing Allura’s voice had created a longing in him that he had not anticipated. He had been without human companionship for what seemed like an age. Even though he had been a solitary man in the past, there were times that he had wished to be amongst people, but he had never fit in. He often felt alienated and isolated; no matter how hard he had tried to become close to people.

It was that feeling that was stirring inside him now. It had started off as a flutter deep inside and soon he could feel it crawl over his skin like a jilted lover, leaving him ever colder. He tried to intensify his efforts to harness the energy inside of him but the more he concentrated the deeper the feeling became. Then to his horror he saw the wall in front of him shimmer. He could no longer see Narhuat suspended in his cocoon, instead the wall slowly coalesced, and warped until it formed a mirror where Alex saw himself reflected back with naked clarity.

He saw himself sitting in the heart of a gigantic bubble of light and it gave him such strength that he was capable of generating such power, but then the image became distorted. Something was wrong; the image became darker, but not from the edges where Alex expected, but from the centre, from Alex himself. He could feel the reflection warp and wend as he saw the darkness emanate from his very heart; from deep within himself.

“You are not strong enough, boy.” He heard a voice say. “See the dark you hold within will destroy everything around you. It has already defeated you for you ARE 

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The Presence. You can not deny it any longer, and as you embrace the darkness from within so the Deluge will embrace and claim you for its own.” Alex saw his whole body fade, the light in him slowly dying and as it did so, the circle of light around him becoming smaller and darker.

There was nothing he could do, Alex was not strong enough, he was being consumed from within, trapped by this cocoon of total darkness that was now constricting him; growing small with every breath, with every heartbeat. Alex saw all this happening before him in the deformed mirror and knew that there was no way he could sustain this level of attack anymore. His energy was all but depleted; never before had he felt so small and so powerless. Like the small child that had been consumed by the Deluge when he had first entered Bellkipeg, now everything had come full circle. Now he was being consumed from within, just as Narhuat was.

And then the revelation hit him, this was not just another trick of the Deluge, it was his own long dark night of the soul. The Deluge was manipulating the light to produce hallucinations in the same way it had used the waves to create the hypnotic state at the beach but it was also mirroring Alex’s own transformation, as he was facing the dark inside himself.

He knew now of The Presence that he held in himself, just as there is darkness inherent in every living organism; but he knew that The Presence was nothing to be afraid of. It could not exist without the light for the darkness defined the light, it was the ultimate source of the lights power and majesty; and it could never truly win for its energy was only a denser vibration: it could only entrap and deplete; depress and pervert. The light came from with, but it was of a much higher vibrational energy; it existed in the space between and gave hope; was eternal and transformative.

And Alex knew that he was a part of that light, of the love, and his energy, his light was simply an extension and projection of that light and could never be depleted, could never weaken or be extinguished. His light, his love, his power was all 

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encompassing and as this awareness was dawning in him so too could he see Narhuat’s cocoon shudder and convulse as the time of his incubation was over. Now was the time for the hatching; the birth of the new soul.

Bellkipeg - Part the Twenty-Fifth

75)

Was it the bite of the salty air on his face that woke him, or the sound of the waves crashing on the shore? It was like a crowd of people applauding his shift to consciousness. It may even have been the smell of the ozone and the taste of the brine on his lips; but when he finally woke up he felt born again.Everything felt perfect.

He opened his eyes to the grinning sun blazing with all its glory and a pale blue sky with candyfloss clouds that looked like they could be plucked out of the sky and eaten. The sand at his back and legs was soft and warm from the sun’s rays, and the sea glinted in acknowledgment that this was, indeed, a perfect day.

He didn’t know where he was but that didn’t bother him. His mind was clear for the first time in ages. He still retained all his memories, but the knowledge that he was the Creator was meaningless to him now. He rolled onto his side to look at the sea lap serenely at the shore; the hissing and gristling of the tide on the pebbles soothing away all his previous worries and concerns. All the time that he spent with Onyx, the weight of the responsibility; it had been too much for him to bear and when he was finally faced with the truth of what Bellkipeg was his mind had cracked; he had blacked out completely only to wake up in this… paradise!

He knew that there was no way that Bellkipeg could die when he was safe; for if he was truly “The Creator” and their destinies were inextricably linked then it made sense! He laughed at Onyx’s delusions.

Alex no longer had any compunction to save anything or anyone. All he wanted was to be left alone, and the only destiny he truly cared about was his own. He turned on to his back once more, smiled at the sun again and went back to sleep.

When he opened his eyes again it was night time, the full moon lazily casting its reflection on the calm sea. Alex felt the need to explore his surroundings a little more and the moon provided enough illumination for him to walk around without bumping into anything.

Brushing the sand from him as he got up, he walked to the water’s edge. The sea was so serene, peacefully lapping at the shore with gentle whispers as the waves withdrew. Alex walked along by the wave’s ebb watching the moons reflection ripple in the wake. He knew that like the island, he had no cares in the world, no responsibility. He stopped and stared into a lone tide pool and saw his own reflection stare back at him; an echo of his former self it looked lost and alone, completely the opposite of how he felt. He picked up a small pebble and dropped it in, scattering his mirrored self into fluctuations; he shivered as the image reverberated. 

It was like a children’s flicker book, the ripples had shattered the serene surface into a staccato stroboscope. In some of the images Alex could see himself wearing a suit and tie; another had him in faded jeans and t-shirt and then in some of them there was a strange man standing behind him, one minute wearing a tatty raincoat, looking dishevelled and unkempt and in others he seemed to have deer’s antlers growing from the top of his head. Alex stepped back and turned round. There was nobody there and he felt a pang of loneliness, a loss as if it were part of himself that he’d temporarily mislaid. 

The tide pool was now fogged with sand and a viscous oily substance that had swallowed the moon. Alex found another pebble to throw into the pool when the oily slick moved away from him as if predicting his next move. Unnerved by this he took a step away and dropped the pebble onto his bare foot. The sharp pain made him wince and look away for a second, when he turned back again the moon had returned, glimmering as if nothing had happened.

76)

Days passed in an idyllic haze. Alex was far happier than he’d been in ages; it was like a mantra, something that he said to himself each morning before he opened his eyes, and this morning was no different. It didn’t matter that he was alone on the island, in fact he now realised he was happiest when he was on his own.

He cautiously got to his feet and felt the blood rushing to his head. He walked slowly to the water’s edge, as he did so every morning. This morning however there appeared to be an oily black film on the sea that moved counter to the tide; it never got any closer to him, it just stayed in one place as if it were spying on him. He laughed at his paranoia; even in paradise he still tried to think the worst and, sure enough, when he looked back there was nothing on the sea except for the gently rising and falling swells.

He laughed again at the way his mind was still trying to tie itself up in knots. For the first time, he was happy but there was still a part of him that couldn’t accept that good things could happen to him. He pinched himself and laughed again at the discomfort it caused: This was real. He was happy, so it was time to enjoy it! He’d been on the island for an age now and had never explored it, and now was as good a time as any!

Walking into the lush vegetation that almost surrounded the beach he marveled at the vibrancy of it all. The verdant green fronds created a cool haven. He was safe; there was nothing on the island to hurt him, so there was no reason to worry, or fret. He could be at peace with himself and enjoy living truly in the moment. Alex explored the island for hours at an end, and in almost every direction. 

The only place he never ventured was into the sea; it never appealed to him. The only time that he felt truly nervous was when he had tried to paddle and even the waves seemed to be afraid of him for they retreated in a black, viscid motion. Time ceased to have any meaning for him, there was enough for him to eat and drink. It was heaven. He sat with his back against a tree, staring out at one of the streams that threaded its way through the heart of the island, and thinking about Onyx and what Allura had taught him. There was still some regret about what he had done.

“As well there should be, my friend.” A deep voice replied from nowhere, disrupting his reverie. “And you won’t be able to find me so don’t try your gazing routine; your whole sense of perspective is skewed at the moment!”

Alex was shocked at this, he knew there was no one in sight; he would have noticed for sure!

“Of course you would.” The voice replied sarcastically. “Try focusing your gaze to the branch on your right, and if you’re perceptive then you’ll see me!” 

Alex had half a mind just to get up and leave; this was too similar to the tricks that Onyx used to pull, but he was  curious about who or what the voice belonged to so he looked to the branch as he was told.  It was just a branch, a stick of wood attached to a tree with some leaves growing out of it. And a caterpillar, standing almost erect, winking at him

“No…. I don’t believe it!” Alex exclaimed. The caterpillar shook its tiny head at him.

“After all you’ve been through, you still don’t believe your own eyes?” The Caterpillar said, with a sarcastic overtone.

“But… I mean, c’mon… you’re a caterpillar!”

“And?” There was now mock hurt in his voice, but Alex realised the caterpillar was right; after all that he’d been through he still came to snap decisions. He laughed at himself. “That’s more like it, Creator. Now we can talk.”

“Even though you’ve got no mouth?” Alex asked cheekily, he wasn’t going to let this phase him anymore. He was in paradise and nothing was going to change that.

“I’m afraid that you’re about as wrong as you can be, on both counts, Creator.” The Caterpillar replied. “I do have a mouth; I just don’t happen to talk through it… and this isn’t paradise…. Don’t let the pretty pictures fool you. You are in more danger here than you’ve ever been…. We both are.” Alex was surprised by the caterpillar’s reaction.

“Why? Nothing’s going to hurt me here!” He replied.

“It’s been too long since you’ve seen the world properly…” The Caterpillar stated. “And please stop referring to me as The Caterpillar. Call me Narhuat.”

“Why are we in danger?” Alex demanded.

“You know why, Creator… but you have hidden yourself from the truth for too long.” Narhuat said. “It seems that we can not talk freely as your mind is still too closed. You must leave me now… It’s too dangerous for me when you are not centred. Think about why you are here and see what is around you. Then we will meet again.”

“How will I find you?” Alex asked.

“You will know…” Narhuat replied. “And if you were truly centred then you wouldn’t have even asked.” With that he inched quickly away leaving Alex bemused.

77)

He hadn’t realised how late it was during the day, the sun was setting and he needed to be back at the beach before it got dark. He walked off dejectedly pondering  Narhuat’s last statement: “If you were centred then you wouldn’t have even asked.” What did he mean by that?

The next morning Alex lay on his side with his eyes closed, listening to the waves on the shore. He felt the sun gently stroke his face and smelt the brine on the air, but it did nothing to calm his mind. He had a good life now, with everything he needed at his disposal, but for some reason he couldn’t block out the conversation he had with Narhuat. The tone of it reminded him so much of his time spent with Onyx.

Alex wanted to dismiss the little caterpillar’s remarks and carry on as he had been, but he couldn’t. Had he changed that much? Narhuat had been almost pleased to see him when they first met, but that soon turned to dismay, as if he had been let down by something.

Alex wanted to forget the caterpillar’s comments and return to the blissful ignorance he’d know upon first waking up on the island, but he couldn’t. Was it ignorance that he’d felt, or simply a complicity? But if that was truly the case then why had Narhuat warned him that he was in more danger here?

Alex thought back to the tide pool; the reflections that he had seen in the water as the pebble had dashed the serene surface. He recalled an earlier time when he was at the mercy of the Vaurac. What wasn’t he seeing now? He knew that there was no point exploring the island any more, it would only serve to strengthen the illusion; and there would be no point in searching for Narhuat unnecessarily. Alex wasn’t grounded enough to do that properly and would only make things worse. He would find the little caterpillar when the time was right and he was ready.

In truth there was only one thing that Alex could do and that was to find a way to centre himself and see behind the illusion.  He sat down on the tip of a sand dune overlooking the sea. The sun was high in the sky and the reflections skittered off the waves creating a pattern that was quite bewitching. The waves moved in a slow motion dance, creating stirs and eddies that furthered this feeling of blissful enchantment.

It took all of Alex’s concentration and willpower to force himself to look away, he knew now that Narhuat was, indeed, correct. Everything was not as it seemed. Alex closed his eyes until he was barely squinting; now the sea no longer held him enraptured and by blinking steadily he could shift his focus without losing concentration.

He sat gazing at the middle distance for hours, constantly shifting his line of sight and the position of his legs. He never for one minute questioned his rationale and the longer he kept his gaze the sea. He didn’t know what he was looking for but constantly gazed, focusing on nothing in particular.

Soon he realised that there were no birds flying in the skies; nothing floating either on the sea itself or splashing within –no fish! That struck him as unnerving, and just then, at the corner of his eyes, he caught a movement that was so subtle he would never have seen it consciously. Shifting his gaze cautiously so he wouldn’t lose focus he knew that what he had seen wasn’t a trick of the light. 

There was a viscous film that coated the surface of the sea like a petroleum slick, but whose oozing and rolling motion ran contrary to the movement of the waves underneath. It was then that Alex knew, without a doubt, that both he and Narhuat were in mortal danger.

Bellkipeg - Part the Twenty-Fourth

72)

Alex pondered Onyx’s words. The only way he could find the Unicorns was through patience,  but there were so many unanswered questions in his head; he was no longer centred and felt far from the patient state of mind he needed. He knew that the only thing he could do was to connect with the Heart of Bellkipeg one last time.

Walking out into the glorious sunlight; he felt such warmth now and the birds sang their loves to the world once again and he could no longer feel The Presence pervading the village. But it wasn’t enough, he needed to know more and the Unicorns were the only ones that could give him that information.

Sitting cross-legged with his back to the Stone he closed his eyes. He knew that Onyx was watching him from the church but Alex blocked it out; he needed to go deep within himself and find the still point where there were no distractions.

Thoughts buzzed around his head like angry insects. One by one he visualised turning the volume down on them until he was alone in silence: pure, white silence; he was boundless. He was one with everything and the whole of creation was one within him.

He could have stayed among the peaceful nothingness, surely after all he had been through it was his reward. Mentally shaking himself free of the limiting beliefs, Alex concentrated on the silence that surrounded him only to realise that it wasn’t silence at all. He was bathed in the most heavenly sounds imaginable, melodies of such beauty that his conscious mind hadn’t registered them at first; sumptuous harmonies and glorious melodies. He felt himself draw closer to the source without thinking about it. The closer he came the purer the melody became until it became a single wondrous tune that soaked into his every pore, his very soul vibrating in sympathetic resonance.

Alex closed his eyes, just wanting to drink as much of the sound in as he could for he knew that in his heart he would never hear the like of it again.

“You can open your eyes now, Creator.” Onyx stood before him, smiling. “You have found it, Creator; the Garden of Eve.” Alex looked around him, everywhere was lush vegetation, plants and flowers of the brightest colours that defied categorisation; so vibrant and pulsating with vivid life. Trees that stood so tall, confident and proud that Alex had never seen their like.

“This is the Garden of Eve?” He asked, almost speechless from the sheer beauty that assailed him. “Are you sure you don’t mean the Garden of Eden?”

“Every story must have its template, Creator.” Onyx explained. “This is where all Creation began; all the beauty that exists in your world and beyond started here.”

“And this is where I draw my strength and power from.” Alex said.

“That is correct.” Onyx replied. “Whilst you are here you will be in complete empathy with all around you; you will be one with Bellkipeg itself; and you will know what Bellkipeg knows. Your conscious mind will take some time to adjust to this, but we may not have enough time.”

Onyx motioned for Alex to look up. The site that met his eyes was something altogether magical. It was a unicorn. The unicorn trotted towards him, light dancing off its skin and mane, the one spiraled horn standing proud from its forehead. Alex felt humbled by its presence and bowed his head in reverence.

“Creator.” Alex felt its voice in his head. “It should be us that should pay homage to you. Please, look upon us. Converse with us for we do not have much time, and you must learn the truth behind the Deluge.” Alex nodded and looked into the Unicorns penetrating azure eyes.

“Tell me, please.” He said. “I need to know… If I’m to defeat the Deluge then I need to know who is controlling it.”

“You already know, Creator.” The unicorn replied in his mind. “And the Deluge can not be defeated and in time you will know this.”

Alex found this hard to comprehend and could feel himself tense up at the prospect of yet more unanswerable questions. The unicorn continued,

“You must open yourself up to the truth, Creator.” The unicorn said. “You know this; you know the truth already but have hidden it from yourself for too long.”

“What do you mean?” He asked, how could he know the truth already? If that were the case then he would never have put himself through this nightmare.

“Before the beginning of this story we were visited by The Presence.” The unicorn explained.

“Why didn’t you try to stop him? Kill him, even if you knew what he would do.” Alex asked, incredulously. Onyx interrupted.

“You know better than to ask such a question.” He reprimanded. “Step outside of yourself , Creator – do not indulge in pettiness now of all times. Unicorns are creatures of peace and truth. They know only of the light and to even suggest of them killing anything is sacrilege.” Alex understood and felt humbled by his outburst.

“I’m sorry.” He said, “I reacted without thinking.” Deep inside he kept wondering how much of the horror could have been avoided had the unicorns seen the creature for what it was and stopped The Presence then and there. He found that so hard to believe that it was starting to cloud his judgement; after all that had happened to him, after all the pain that he had been put through.

“Yes, we feel that your reactions still cause you great pain and will continue to do so unless you learn to curb that part of you.” The unicorn replied. “We can feel your pain and empathise, as we could feel the pain of The Presence.”

“What… why did The Presence come to the Garden?” 

“For one of the apples from the Tree of Know.”

“And you gave it to him?” 

“We had no choice.” The Unicorn replied and shook its head.

“You should let the Unicorn tell its tale,” Onyx interrupted, “You might understand what the Unicorn is trying to tell you.” Alex nodded and the Unicorn continued.

73)

“When the stranger first appeared we could not sense anything untoward with him, he seemed at peace with all around him. We welcomed him to the Garden, as we do all visitors that find their way here, and told him that he could partake of anything that grew.” The Unicorn bowed its head remembering what happened next. “The Stranger asked for an Apple from the Tree of Know, something that no one else had ever asked for. Nobody else even knew of its existence, but he knew and it was the one thing that we were unable to give to him. He smiled and simply asked to stay in the garden for a few days. We saw no reason to refuse him and so he stayed.”

“What did he do whilst he stayed with you?” Alex asked.

“Very little.” The Unicorn replied. “He walked with us, and sat amongst the trees and the flowers, never straying too far from the Tree.

“A few days later we noticed the first signs of sickness creep into our beautiful garden. The flowers started to lose their vibrancy and began to wilt and die. We had never seen this kind of decay in our perfect world and did not know what to do. We know of no evil and could not begin to understand what was causing this to happen.”

“How do you mean, know of no evil?” Alex interrupted.

“The Unicorns are one with the heart of Bellkipeg.” Onyx explained. “They are pure beings and know of only light, love and harmony. To them evil does not exist because there is no evil in their hearts.”

“So we could not see the stranger for what he may have been.” The Unicorn explained.

“May have been?” Alex exclaimed. “How do you mean, may have been?!”

“Be not so hasty as to judge without knowing the full circumstances, Creator.” Alex was about to argue when Onyx motioned for him to be silent. Everything now seemed unreal, after everything he had been through; to be finally at the end of his quest only to find out that it could all have been avoided… Alex felt drained by this discovery; he was close to weeping bitter tears.

“The Stranger offered us an answer to our predicament.” Continued the Unicorn.

“Let me guess, one of the apples.” Alex replied in a dead pan voice. Something was definitely wrong; he could no longer stand against the tide. There was such a resurgence of feelings repressed. He felt helpless against things beyond his control.

“Yes.” The Unicorn agreed. “Of course, we could not agree to his solution at first.”

“But you did, eventually.” Alex interrupted.

“When the pain became too much for us to bear; watching the Garden wither and die, we implored the Stranger to help us if he could. He calmly repeated his offer of an apple which we gladly gave him this time – anything to restore the heart of our land.”

“What happened then?” Alex asked.

“Once the Stranger had what he wanted, he simply walked out of our Garden.” The Unicorn replied, its head bowed low.

74)

“The Stranger left…” Alex repeated the words, almost in a monotone and then looked at the Unicorn in the eyes again. “… and the Garden miraculously came back to life; it started to flower and fruit again?”

“Yes, that is so.” There was palpable shame in the Unicorns voice, if it was indeed possible for such an emotion to be recognised in the creature. Alex didn’t know, but he felt such an anger, a righteous anger – he couldn’t understand how the Unicorns had been so naive.

“You find it easy to judge, Creator.” Onyx said, breaking Alex’s concentration. “What would you have done in such a situation, I wonder?” He asked.

“I’m sure that I would’ve behaved differently!” Alex reprimanded. Onyx looked sad at his reply, and the Unicorn turned to Onyx and said:“He does not know yet, Old One?”

Onyx shook his head. “He has not been ready enough to be told.” Alex turned to Onyx in disbelief. “As you can see now…”

“He has to be told, Old One…” The Unicorn replied.

“What?” Alex interrupted. “What do I have to be told?”

“You were in a similar situation to ourselves.” The Unicorn said. “You were in a position to stop The Presence but did not.”

Alex was shocked by this, he couldn’t understand what the Unicorn was saying.

“When?!” He demanded. “When was I in a position to do anything of the sort?”

“When you dragged the boy out of the cave.” Onyx replied solemnly.

“But that boy was me, you said.” Alex replied. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing, it seemed too unbelievable.

“Yes, Creator, and I told you to destroy the boy before it was too late, but you couldn’t.” Onyx’s eyes bored deep into Alex.

Alex took a step back in horror as he realised what Onyx was saying. He turned to look at the Unicorn, but the Unicorn turned away.

“The boy… was taken by the Deluge.” Alex spoke in a monotone, he found it so hard to utter the words, even the idea was too fantastic, too frightening for him to bear. “I thought he had been killed…”

“No.” Onyx spoke in low, calming tones. He knew how hard this was for Alex, but he needed to know. “Just as the Priest in Slauwood had been taken over by the Deluge, so the boy became corrupted by his own pain and suffering that the Deluge nurtured until he became The Presence.”

Alex reeled from this influx of information. “How did all this happen so quickly?” He asked.

“Time has no meaning here, Creator.” Onyx gently explained. “Causality follows its own path regardless of the ticking by of minutes and days. This land has existed long before you came here and will continue to exist long past your leaving; but you have created it nonetheless.”

Alex was speechless, and yet inside he knew. He had known this all along, intrinsically, deep within but hadn’t wanted to admit it to himself –hence the amnesia? This was his creation, but how?

“Feel the truth, Creator, you need to feel it not run away from it. Everything you see here; all of Bellkipeg itself is here because you created it. You are the Creator.”

“No..” Alex pushed himself from the ground and backed away, reeling from the words as if he had been struck. “There is no way I could create something as beautiful as this….” He stated.

“And it is that mindset that brought you here in the first place.” Onyx said.

“What do you mean?” Alex asked, shaking with disbelief. “I don’t understand… I don’t understand!”

“It is too late to hide from yourself now, Creator.” The Unicorn spoke, in sympathy. “You must face this. You must fight through this. You were brought here because you negated your life for too long.” Alex buried his face in his hands willing with all this might that this wasn’t true. “You were gifted with such powers, such imagination but your deep seated loathing of yourself prevented you from harnessing those powers and changing your life for the better.”

Onyx continued, “You used to dream of Bellkipeg, and in your mind lived it during those long lonely hours. When the dreams became too much for you to handle you started taking tablets and turned to alcohol to take them away and for a while you were given a reprieve to drown your life away in your own little room.”

“But it wasn’t long before the dreams started to invade your waking life.” The Unicorn interrupted. “We are a force of creation, of change… Where we have visited others the change has always been one of utmost joy and beauty.” The Unicorn said with his head bowed low. “But never before had we ever encountered such resistance. You fought against us; against your own creative self, and in doing so repressed that portion of yourself.”

“And it was through that repression that the Deluge was born.” Onyx continued. “The Deluge encompasses all your negativity; all of your dashed dreams and hopes; your anger and bitterness made whole.” Alex was shaking with grief, fear and anger… with every direction he turned he was faced with the reality of his actions. What the Unicorn was saying was the truth: it was because of him that the Deluge had been created and all the hurt, all the pain and suffering that had happened was because of Alex.

“And where did the Deluge strike?” The Unicorn asked, solemnly.

“At the same place you used to hit out at; your child-self.” Onyx answered. “That small boy that you tried so desperately to save when you first entered Bellkipeg was the same one that you heaped all your derision on, all your scorn.”

“No!” Alex shouted. “I never did that… I never hurt myself that way.”

“Look at your wrists, Creator.” Onyx spoke silently.

Alex did as he was asked. Running down his wrists were scars, one on each wrist; a calligraphic stroke to symbolise his pain. Alex could no longer hold back the tears. All this time he had fooled himself thinking that he was the hero; the one that could save Bellkipeg. But now he knew he was only saving the land from himself. Whichever way he turned now there was only pain; misery and anger. He couldn’t handle it any more.

He ran, looking neither to Onyx nor the Unicorns for he had failed them. He could no longer bear the responsibility and fled the garden. He felt nothing now. He had no idea where he was going or what would become of him, and nor did he care. 

So pre-occupied was he with his own pain, he wasn’t aware that the ground underneath had become spongy as he was ran; nor that the sky had darkened and the woodland around him become deathly silent. And when the Deluge engulfed him it was far too late...